


Close your eyes, fall in love, stay there

by VeraBAdler



Series: October 2018 challenges [14]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-01 23:47:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16294265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeraBAdler/pseuds/VeraBAdler
Summary: The wall between Dean and Cas finally comes down for good.Fictober prompt: “Some people call this wisdom.”Promptober prompt: Disney





	Close your eyes, fall in love, stay there

“I can't do this, Cas. I– _We_ can't do this.” Dean stood in front of him, scant inches away, chest heaving, eyes bright. His mouth, freshly kissed, was plump and tantalizing.

Castiel sighed. He'd thought... The time had seemed right at last. The invisible wall between them had felt so thin, like a bubble he could pop with a touch. All of the love for Dean that he'd held within himself through the years had been shining back at him in his hunter's eyes. And he'd thought that the moment had arrived when they could finally push aside their fear and hesitation and come together as one.

So he'd reached out and he'd pulled his beloved to him. Dean had responded eagerly at first, opening his lips to welcome Castiel's questing tongue. But no sooner had the angel gotten a taste of that beautiful mouth than he'd been pushed away again.

“This is not something that hunters can have,” Dean continued. “We give up our chance for love and happy families when we pick up the holy water and the salt rounds. It's one of the sacrifices we have to make if we want to do the job.”

“That's nonsense,” the angel retorted, heat coloring his words. “What about Jody and Donna? Jesse and Cesar? You've met married hunters before, people who have made a soft place for each other within the life.”

“Okay, sure.” Dean shoved both his hands into his own hair, gripping tightly in frustration, then dropped his arms back to his sides, limp. “But that's not something _I_ get to have, Cas. People I love get dead, and I can't lose you again. I'd rather have you here and never touch you than get everything I could ever want and then have it ripped away.”

“Dean...” Castiel was overcome by the rawness of his words. “You're everything I could ever want, too. You bring me joy, you dim the pains of this flawed world. We could be each other's light, my love. The poet Rumi once wrote, 'Whatever lifts the corners of your mouth, trust that.' Some people call this wisdom, Dean.” 

“Well, some people call that bullshit, Cas. This ain't no Disney cartoon where you kiss me and everything's magically perfect forever.”

“Of course not. I'm not looking for perfection. There's no such thing. But a life without love isn’t a life. And I know you fear the pain of losing what we could have together, but Dean, we have a _bond_. I always come back to you. 'Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation.' That was Rumi, too. Please...” He closed the space between them again and took Dean gently into his arms. “I don't want to keep myself apart from you any more. My skin hungers for you, and my heart calls to yours.”

The hunter melted into the embrace. Their mouths met deeply, then parted, and Dean sighed.

“I can't fight you, Cas. I never could. I don't want to be apart from you, either. It scares the shit out of me, but I want this. I want _us_. Do you really think we can have that?”

“I do, my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'd like to thank my co-author on this piece, the 13th-century Persian poet Rumi. Thanks for the collab, buddy! Seriously, though, besides the two passages that Cas explicitly cites, the title is also from his writings, and there's one more small simple quote hidden up in there.
> 
> And hey, here's one more from Rumi, a line that I bet Cas also knows by heart and has thought about more than once when Dean was driving him crazy:
> 
> "Love sometimes wants to do us a great favor: hold us upside down and shake all the nonsense out."
> 
> Rebloggable link for this fic on tumblr is [here](https://blessyourhondahurley.tumblr.com/post/179042205456/october-14-close-your-eyes-fall-in-love-stay).


End file.
